The Secret Lives of Cats: Final Report

Using last week at home (with pneumonia) as my cover, I undertook a dire and perilous mission. I attempted to infiltrate and gather intelligence on the secret lives of cats.

This will serve as the final report from my investigation.

I'm afraid I must admit defeat. While there were suspicious circumstances, I was never able to collect any hard evidence to prove that our cats do anything more than sleep, eat and play while we are away at work during the day. Is this the truth? Or were they able to bamboozle me during my short stint at detective work?

All I have left, at the end, is a big question mark...