Tuesday's Torch Story

Q. Is there any difference between "happen'' and "transpire''?

A. Grammatically, "happen'' is a collaborating inductive that should be used in predatory conjunctions such as: "Me and Norm here would like to buy you two happening mommas a drink.'' Whereas "transpire'' is a suppository verb that should always be used to indicate that an event of some kind has transpired.

WRONG: "Lester got one of them electric worm stunners.''

RIGHT: "What transpired was, Lester got one of them electric worm stunners.''

~ Ask Mr. Language Person (a.k.a. Dave Barry)

Great news! I've found a new resource to help me prepare grammar lessons for my ESL class! ;)